When we listen TO someone, we hear what they are saying, and we often miss WHY they are saying it. The meaning behind the words reveals who the person is being in that moment. Are they frustrated or hopeful, determined or resigned? Are they focused on positive choices or stuck in negative thinking based on past experiences?
WHY we do what we do is often based on our past experiences. Sometimes this puts limits on the way we think and act in the moment. That’s why a person might express a goal or an intention, then do something different, maybe even making a decision counterproductive to what they’ve expressed as a goal. We don’t do this because we’re foolish or shortsighted. We behave this way when who we’re being is not in line with what we’re thinking.
When you listen FOR who someone is being, rather than TO what they are saying, you’re listening as a gift. When you listen FOR someone, it’s a way you’re being, a contribution to that person. Listening TO someone will reveal what they’re saying, leaving you, the listener, trying to decode that message. Sometimes, that creates miscommunication and misunderstanding that may not be revealed until much later. Listening FOR someone, puts the focus on who that person is being as they say what they are saying: Are they in the present? Are they looking ahead, or are they stuck, making decisions based on their past?
When we listen FOR someone, we are giving up what we think about what they are saying. This allows a connection to form, and we both enter into a spirit of harmony.
When you listen FOR who someone is being, rather than TO what they are saying, you’re listening as a gift. When you listen FOR someone, it’s a way you’re being, a contribution to that person. Listening TO someone will reveal what they’re saying, leaving you, the listener, trying to decode that message. Sometimes, that creates miscommunication and misunderstanding that may not be revealed until much later. Listening FOR someone, puts the focus on who that person is being as they say what they are saying: Are they in the present? Are they looking ahead, or are they stuck, making decisions based on their past?
When we listen FOR someone, we are giving up what we think about what they are saying. This allows a connection to form, and we both enter into a spirit of harmony.
Curiosity and other ways to conquer fear
At its core, curiosity is about learning truth rather than assuming truth, seeking new information rather than letting the past define us…
How influential leaders earn trust
Ask most people how to earn trust and expect to hear something along the lines of “keep your word…” or “live up to expectations…” While these are important aspects of building trust in any relationship, these are not the only ways to earn and maintain trust. Consider,...
This key shift will help you become a more influential leader
Sometimes, leadership feels harder than it should be. Certain things need doing, your team is clear on the objective, and those action items still aren’t getting done. Even when they are, you can feel the lack of enthusiasm for the work. Sometimes it manifests as...
What game are you playing?
Have you ever considered how the language you use affects your ability to be an influential leader? When you listen to how some leaders speak, it sounds like their team is competing for a Super Bowl ring. “Crush the competition…” “Let’s be #1…” “Tackle that challenge…” “Let’s get this win…”
These key insights into Millennials can energize your organization
Hey leaders, did you know your real job is not ‘being in charge’? Your chief responsibility is taking care of those who look to you to lead them. That was the message delivered by author and international leadership development consultant Simon Sinek…
Autocrat or Influencer? Take the Quiz!
Most leaders don’t like to think of themselves as autocrats. Domineering people who lead by denigrating others and expect total obedience. However, in many cases…
0 Comments